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The Surgeon Was a Lady Page 15
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“The country air has the same effect on all my friends, but thanks anyway... and now if you don’t mind, I’d like to get some sleep.”
He strolled past her and went to his room, but her eyes followed his every movement until he closed the door.
***
Willie returned to her present thoughts and retired to her study, but she was unable to concentrate on anything and simply stared at the pile of papers in front of her, as she sat with her head in her hands and could think of nothing or no-one but Fred.
The telephone rang and brought her back to reality with a bump.
“Hello,” she said and pulled her left earring from her ear.
“May I speak to Doctor Fehrenbach, please... Doctor Wilhelmina Fehrenbach?”
“Yes, speaking,” she snapped, “Who am I talking to?”
“Oh Doctor... I am Mr. Wexinford’s private secretary. Would it be possible for you to come to see Mr. Wexinford tomorrow... say about 11.00 a.m.?”
“Tomorrow... but I’m due back to work in the Theatre tomorrow and besides, I only saw Mr. Wexinford yesterday. Is this urgent, can you tell me? It is something to do with my husband, isn’t it?”
“I think so Doctor, but I would prefer that Mr. Wexinford explain the matter to you. You will be able to come for the appointment then... Yes?”
Willie played nervously with her earring and it fell to the floor.
“OK.. I’ll be there, but I may have to make it earlier than 11.0... say about ten or ten-thirty, yes?”
There was a moment of silence and then the secretary spoke again, but she only said one word... “Why?” and Willie became very angry at this curt reply.
“Because I’ve got a bloody list of patients to see, Duckie... before you’re out of your bed tomorrow... that’s bloody why... Satisfied?”
The private secretary coughed.
“We’ll see you tomorrow then Doctor, when you’ve saved the lives of all those needy people, yes?”
Willie answered her with a monosyllable.
“Cow!” she barked into the phone and hung up.
***
She continued to stare into space as she sat thinking by her desk. Her mind was disturbed about many things, but her eyes saw nothing. She went along to Paul’s room and went in quietly to feel his pulse. He moaned and tried to turn.
“Ssssh! I’m sorry... I didn’t mean to wake you up, baby. Go back to sleep now. We have to pay another little visit to old buggerlugs tomorrow, but don’t worry. I’ll go and see what he wants. No need for you to stir.”
As she returned to her paperwork she noticed that although Fred’s door was closed and she had presumed he had gone to sleep, there was sound of voices coming from inside. She stood still in the corridor listening for a few moments, before she turned the handle of his door and marched in unannounced and without knocking.
Fred was sitting up in bed, stripped to the waist... as far as she could see and Clemmie was sitting on the bed beside him. She jumped up as Willie came storming into the room.
“What the hell’s going on?” she yelled, “What are you doing in here?” she screamed her demand at Clemmie and her eyes were wild, but it was Fred who answered.
“I invited Danny to see some of my books, but as I’m not on duty until 8.00 this evening, I don’t think my movements are any concern of yours at all.”
“She’s not off duty, yet...” Willie barked, pointing a shaking finger at Clemmie. “Danny indeed, is it now... well, well, that’s very cosy, I must say. Is this a pet name you have for her now? You,” she demanded looking at Clemmie... Out... Move.”
Clemmie hurried towards the door to leave the room.
“No... Don’t go...” It was Fred who spoke out boldly, “This is your break time. You can’t be expected to work all day without a break.” Willie glowered at him savagely. Her face went red and she shook with anger, but he looked back calmly at her. “We are doing no harm... nor are we neglecting your husband,” he said “What more do you expect from us?”
Willie sneered as she swept past Clemmie who was already standing in the doorway of Fred’s bedroom.
“Oh stay with him then... You’ll come to no harm here with this bloody eunuch. I doubt if he’d know what to do with it anyway... as far as you are concerned,” she screeched and left the room, pushing Clemmie to one side and banging the door behind her, but Fred jumped out from his bed and ran after her in a rage. He grabbed her by the arm.
“What do you mean by that remark?” he demanded as he stared straight into her eyes, but she pulled away from him and her lips curled.
“I don’t care what the hell you do with her... “she shouted, “But stay well away from my husband. Do you hear me?”
He glared at her in disgust.
“You should be ashamed of yourself to even think such a thing and perhaps if you had treated Paul as a husband, you wouldn’t have all this stupid anger welling up inside you that is tearing your inside apart.”
Her face went white.
“Get out of my house, immediately... I don’t want you creeping around here like a dog in heat with your tongue hanging out...”
Clemmie began to cry and Fred turned towards her and turned his back on Willie...
“Don’t cry, darling. If I’m not wanted here, I’ll leave, but it doesn’t mean we have to part. I’ll come and see you.”
Willie’s mouth fell open and she stared about her in surprise. She was speechless as Clemmie came towards her face to face.
“I’d like you to take my notice too,” she said calmly, “I’ll leave with Seyone. I won’t stay here without him.”
“Danny... No, you can’t do that... think of Paul,” Seyone cried out and Willie’s eyes bulged from her head as she tried to talk.
“Seyone?... Danny?... What the hell are you talking about? What are you calling each other now? You idiots...”
Fred put his arm around Clemmie
“”These are our real names which we now choose to use, but it will not concern you any more. I shall leave tomorrow afternoon, but I hope for your sake that Danny... or Clemmie as you have so condescendingly called her, stays with you. Your husband needs some kind of kindness and warmth and he won’t get any of that from you.”
He closed his eyes and there was remorse in his heart. He did not want to leave Willie’s home... not because of her... but because of Paul, whom he had grown to respect and because of the promise he had made to him that evening only a short time ago and in another previous moment of distress when he had touched Paul’s cold finger.
“I will not leave you... I promise... Don’t worry.” He had said and as he reflected on that promise, he heard a crash... the sound of breaking glass and Seyone rushed into Paul’s room. He had knocked over Paul’s water jug and glass which lay in pieces on the floor and he had fallen out of bed. Seyone rushed towards him and lifted him gently from the floor as Danny pulled the sheets away to allow Paul back into bed. Seyone examined his head for cuts or bruises but fortunately there were none. He had fallen onto the carpet, but his eyes looked red and strange as if he had some sort of a fit. His eyes began to roll in his head and white frothy bubbles came from between his lips. Danny straightened the sheets over him and held his head close to her own as Seyone massaged his hands and tried to talk to him... through his fingers... and all this time, Willie stood by and did nothing.
***
It was some time before they could pacify Paul and leave him to sleep off the effects of his disturbance with the help of some of his pills. Seyone was sure that Paul had overheard the argument and probably panicked, as he would indeed have done, if he thought that Seyone was going to leave him, but before he left Paul’s bedside, Seyone stroked his patient’s hair to ensure that he was asleep and Paul woke up at the moment of touch. His eyes, of olive
hue, pleaded in innocent silence, not to be left alone and that look tore into Seyone’s heart, making him wish he had never incited Willie to the anger that he had done.
“I wish I had never come here...” he said as he left Paul’s room. “I wish I had never ever met the Fehrenbachs... I wish... I wish... Oh gawd, how I wish...”
Willie stood rigid by his side and had heard what Seyone had thought to be his private thoughts. He had not seen her standing in the shadows and she stepped forward and took Seyone’s right hand, placing it gently in Danny’s left...
“I am sorry...” she said softly, “I am truly sorry for what I said. Please forgive me. Be with your love Seyone and I wish you both every happiness together and please... please both of you stay with Paul. He needs you both.”
***
She turned up at Professor Wexinford’s surgery at 10.45 a.m. to be greeted scornfully by the cow... who looked disdainfully at her tiny diamond crusted wrist watch.
“Mr. Wexinford will see you shortly. Will you please take a seat, Mrs. Fehrenbach,” she said with her nose in the air, but Willie ignored her completely as she strolled on into the Professor’s office and closed the door behind her, but the cow appeared after her to apologise to the Specialist and Willie took the opportunity to accept the apology to herself as she pooh-poohed the secretary with a wave of her hand.
“Don’t bother to grovel. I accept your apology... Now just coffee please. Cream... No sugar.”
Mr. Wexinford’s secretary retired as gracefully as she could, trying not to show her anger with a patronizing smile as Wexinford glanced at her under his bushy eyebrows and nodded. Willie hissed and the Professor invited her to sit down.
“Good morning Doctor Fehrenbach. I am sorry to have found it necessary to ask you to come here again so soon after your last visit but something has come up and it is important that we discuss this matter without further delay.” Willie listened twisting her glove from her wrist, but she said nothing as he continued, “The X-rays we took on Wednesday have shown that there is a subdural haematoma... it was so small that at first it went unnoticed, but on further examination the following morning, it appears to be spreading across the cerebellum. Tell me... did your husband have a fall or any undue harsh movement in the last few weeks?”
Willie paled as she thought of the argument with Seyone and Danny... but that was only last night... and AFTER the last visit to Wexinford...
“No,” she replied weakly, “None that I can recall, but then Paul frequently falls about when he’s on his own and has to be hauled back into bed again,” she lied thinking it might cover any eventuality that Wexinford might encounter.
“Hhhhm! and he hasn’t had any undue anxiety that you can recall... Something that might make him move his head excessively... similar to a blow on the head, for example?”
Willie turned on Wexinford in anger.
“Look here, Mr. Wexinford... if you are trying to tell me something, I’d rather you spat it out and didn’t go round beating about the bush. I have excellent nursing care for my husband, both day and night... twenty-four hours round the clock and I have every confidence in their ability as professional nursing staff to take the greatest care of him... and besides, he likes them... and so do I.”
Professor Wexinford blinked and his brow furrowed.
“I am indeed pleased to hear that, but are you telling me that your husband responds to the nursing care that he is receiving?”
“Yes, of course he does. We have a method of talking to him and he answers back by the finger movement. I thought you knew that already.”
Wexinford got up from his desk and walked across the room.
“This is more interesting that I had ever imagined, Doctor Fehrenbach and I must congratulate you on this extremely rare progress. You see, when I first had Paul as a patient... I would have given him six months... a year at the most to live. His brain was so badly damaged that I would have considered him to be severely incapacitated, even in the short time I had allowed for life expectancy... but to have made contact with you... and the other nursing staff, with his fingers... I am amazed... “
Willie sat in silence and twiddled her fingers. She then realized the importance of what the Professor had said... and also how she had been so full of her own importance... and her affairs, to consider any progress in Paul at all. She too, had thought, like the Professor that he was brain-dead and that it was only a matter of time... and most important of all... it was only after Clemmie had come to nurse Paul, that this change had taken place. She remembered the first time it was recognised, but she didn’t attribute the importance to it that she should have done.
“What do you suggest now, Mr. Wexinford,” she said quietly, with a note of apology in her voice and as he turned straight away to face her, his pince-nez fell from the bridge of his nose and dropped to his chest. The spectacles dangled there for a second on a thin black cord, before he replaced them again.
“It will need surgery to rectify the matter, doctor... you know that and I know that, but it will require great skill... great delicacy, combined with speedy movement.
It will have to be done accurately... in the first incision... otherwise, I cannot say what the result may be.”
“Would you do it, Professor?” she asked, but he shook his head.
“I am too old, my dear... my hands are not as steady as they once were and I would not even think to take the risk... but I know someone who would...” he said and smiled into her eyes, but Willie sniffed and turned away from him. She knew what was in his mind, but she was afraid. It was one thing to have Paul nursed with such proficiency as she had done, but another to go into his brain herself... and literally work a miracle.
“You are talking about...”
“Yes, you, “ he said. “You are the person best to perform this task. You have the skill and the experience, more than any other I know. That is the real reason why I asked you to come back to see me so soon. This operation must be carried out as soon as possible and certainly I would say within the next two weeks, if it is to succeed... and even then, doctor... I have to warn you that there will be great risks. “
“But is there no other way?” she asked.
“None that I can see, but then I have made an error in the past when I told you that in my consideration, Paul would only last for at least a year... and now look... It is nearly three years on since then. Paul could live for several years now... that is fairly obvious, but he will never be any better than he is at this moment in time... unless...”
Willie reflected on the slobbering young man she had lived with for the past five years... and she wondered if she could go an as she was doing. Was it fair to her, as a woman... and was it fair to Paul... as a... she wanted to say, as a Man... but her eyes filled with tears.
She wanted to tear the selfishness out of her character and look at things in a different light,. but she knew who she was and what she was... wondering would she ever change... Maybe Ted Sutherland had the answer she required and she reflected again on the operation she might have to perform on her husband... if she agreed to do it... On the consequences that could happen... and the hardness in her heart took over for a short time again. She could be free again... free from all that slobbering and the other unhygienic details that attended her husband’s illness, and Paul would be free... Just one little slip of the scalpel... in the wrong area... a simple mistake... anyone could do it and she could never be blamed. Didn’t the Professor tell her it would be a great risk? Wouldn’t that be in his file... Yes... It was all so simple now. She would do it. She would operate on Paul and get the freedom she had wanted for so long...
“Are you alright, Doctor Fehrenbach? You look a little pale all of a sudden... Oh I wish my secretary had brought in the coffee by now... She is always so...”
Willie shook her head gently.
“No... No, I am fine Professor... Just the shock of thinking of the events as you have described. I’m alright... but I could not operate on my husband... I think the emotional risk would be too great...” she said, dismissing her dream of freedom...
“But Doctor... this is a grave matter as I have told you. There is no need for a rush decision. Take your time... as long as I can have your answer by the end of next week.”
“No... I have made my decision now, Professor... I cannot operate on Paul.”
“Doctor... You know there will be only one chance... One operation... there will be no opportunity for another and Paul could be an imbecile for the rest of his life.”
Willie stared at the floor... Srange... she thought she could see a stain there similar to the one at Ted’s office, but it couldn’t be... and yet it was... It was as if she had been sitting in that same chair in that same office for the second time. She looked again and moved her toe towards it...
“You have a stain on your carpet, Professor,” she said, “Do you know that?”
“Yes,” he said, “It has been there for some time now and no matter what we try... we can’t remove it.”
Willie’s head began to spin and she wished she could have a cigarette, before she remembered that she had given it up... on her second attempt... or was it her third and at that moment the Cow came into the office with the coffee.
“Perhaps you are right, Doctor Fehrenbach... in your decision... but could I ask you please, to consider what your husband’s thoughts on this matter would be. You tell me he talks with his fingers... so ask him... Ask him what he would want and then let me have your answer. It could be that your husband, who knows your expert skill in this field, would want you to operate on him, himself... and for no other surgeon to do it... He is entitled to expect the best after all... isn’t he?”